The blog
thoughts from me to you
Reflections
I currently have an incredible teacher in my life who seems to bring me a lot of pain. As weird as this may sound, and seemingly outside of my control, I will randomly experience what they are experiencing. Sometimes it's physical pain, sometimes emotional pain. It...
Stop forcing what isn’t flowing
This goes against what many motivational speakers will tell you, but from what I've seen (and experienced personally) the happiest people are those that are in flow with what is, not fighting against it trying to force something to be the way they think it should...
Is your pain great enough?
Your feelings are valid. There will always be people going through seemingly 'worse' situations than you. Their experiences are valid too. Feelings are not mutually exclusive, they are not in competition and they are not only allowed to be experienced by one person at...
Triggered
I had an eating disorder in my early twenties which, although awful, I was able to recover from.Every now and again, with certain triggers, I get the urge to starve myself again. It's a coping mechanism which I understand now and can even appreciate or at least have...
Surviving and thriving
Affirmations don't work.If you have any kind of belief that conflicts with whatever you're trying to tell yourself in any way, your RAS (reticular activating system) will throw that puppy right out the window so as not to cause any internal conflict. The way to change...
On hopelessness and surrendering
A friend asked me the other day if I had ever felt overwhelmed when meeting a client for the first time and hearing their 'story' or the reasons why they were seeking support. Honestly, overwhelmed, no. In awe, deeply honoured and humbled....yes.When someone shares...
When nothing makes sense
Our brains like to make sense of things. It's why as children, if we experience abandonment or trauma, we often internalise it as being our fault, because our brains need answers and our cognitive ability isn't able to understand the wider context.We take things...
Something on loss
Something on loss:When we lose someone, or perhaps even a beloved pet, there is often an urge to 'fill the hole' left with another person, a new relationship, a new pet. That strategy can seem to work temporarily, but when you put your happiness outside of yourself,...
Healing miracles
There's a couple of miraculous moments that happen in a healing process, when you know all the tears, all the frustration, blame, guilt and shame, and all the work you've been doing to heal them are finally starting to make a difference.The first is when you notice...