Struggle and success

Struggle and success

Struggle is not synonymous with success.

We are so conditioned to believe the narrative that in order to be successful we need to have fought and struggled, that success doesn’t come easily.

Does this narrative work for you? If that wasn’t true, what story would you prefer? What if success was available independent of struggle? What if, success could be easy, or hard? What if there was space for a choice?

Question your beliefs. Every time something feels heavy, ask if it’s because of a story you’re telling yourself about what is. Change your story. You don’t need anyone’s permission to empower yourself.

Want someone to guide you through the process? Click the link in my bio to book a complimentary consult call – make success easier 💕
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Photo credit: @da1sybrown

Presence

Presence

Today I took a full day off to go exploring parts of Portugal I hadn’t seen, and be fully present to the experience.
It’s been an old habit that part of my mind is always on my work, my clients, my to do list. I love all these things, however, they have their own dedicated time.
It’s been a challenge for me to learn to stay present to what’s happening now, and fully integrate the experience. It used to be a way of regulating contact – keeping a safe distance from things and people in my life, before I learned to feel safe independently of whatever situation I found myself in.

Today (and many times), I chose to make a consistent effort to be present, even when my mind wanted to pull me away, and really enjoy each moment. It’s ok that some work didn’t get done, it’ll get done when it needs to.

Where do you live? Here, now? How much do you fully experience each precious moment of your life?

Perception

Perception

She didn’t believe for a second that life was always going to be easy, but what she had realised, was that, through any pain, there were two opportunities: she could stay bitter and resentful for as long as she needed, and fight the accepting of what is, or, she could grieve her loss, feel her pain, and ask how she could grow from this, and find meaning in the pain for herself.

Because isn’t this what makes the pain so much worse? The senselessness of it? Or the internal conflict that comes from wanting something to be different from that which it is? If we were able to sit with the pain, know it without wishing it was something else, and knowing that it would make sense in the future, and that some growth and meaning would come from it, wouldn’t that make the pain more manageable?
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Photo credit: @loveluella photography

The art of ‘Shoulding’ on yourself

The art of ‘Shoulding’ on yourself

I felt as though I *should* write today, then scolded myself for ‘shoulding’ on myself. So I just begun this whole pain cycle of having a belief contradict what felt in alignment for me (I should be writing but I don’t feel inspired to), then, to add some salt to the little scratch of inner conflict, I decided to beat myself up for it….just to make sure I really opened the wound and kept my belief in separateness good and strong.

We are all the parts. They all make up ‘us’. We encompass everything. The strong and the weak, good and bad. The moment we create a belief around who we should be, or how the world should be, is the moment we reject the other aspects of that continuum, and create inner conflict that shows up as low self esteem, depression, anxiety and self sabotaging behaviours like addiction.

The moment we can identify the pattern, and call it out, is the moment we can choose to stay present: to notice the uncomfortableness of having an ego need go unmet, and choose how to proceed, with consciousness and a respect for our own integrity.

INTRGRITY: “the state of being whole and undivided.” And in working through this conflict, I realise the irony in that I became inspired to write!

P.S. if you would love to start accepting and loving yourself and letting go of any of the things I mention above, please click the link in my bio and let’s work together

Fitting in

Fitting in

She had spent so long trying to find her place, and figure out ‘where’ she fitted in, before she realised that there was no ‘place’ she fitted into. There wasn’t a particular space that could contain her, because the space was a part of her. She had been looking at it backward the whole time, and thinking there was somewhere she could find ‘out there’ or someone, who would make her feel safe, somewhere she felt safe to be herself, when, in reality, she had to do that for herself.

And so, she asked herself each morning:

What can I do today to bring more peace, and love, into my life, and the lives of those around me?
Do the things have planned bring me closer, or further away from who I want to be, and what I want to do?
How can I embody love, and release the blocks to it’s constant presence in me?

Choosing better

Choosing better

Sometimes the pebbles feel like boulders, and the smallest splinters light a fire in you that transforms the smallest, most insignificant thing into a monster inside you. Turning you into a monster.
That is why there are no insignificant things. That’s why all feelings are valid, and why, if we allow ourselves to feel and honour them, we can give ourselves the space to ask, is there more information here? Is there another perspective that would feel more peaceful to me? Do I have to feel this way?

Here’s an invitation to be more curious today 💕
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Photo credit: @tom.pelgrom