by Emma | Feb 13, 2020
Maybe it was possible to find peace without contrast. Maybe you found peace IN the contrast?
Maybe, as she experienced the edges of her comfort zone, it was possible to discover her peace, even in the midst of the discomfort, in the situations and experiences that scared her, brought out her desire to defend herself, or brought on a weariness that made her want to run away to the comfort of a life less interesting, and all together less inspiring.
Maybe that was the goal: not to be happy with everything, but to be able to find her centre, her own source of peace and comfort, even when faced with the random human challenges of day to day life?
My journey in Bali has only just begun, and yet it’s already pushed so many of my buttons; physically, emotionally and mentally. I am grateful for more opportunities to clear the blocks to love, despite how it feels at the time.
I have gone to sleep the last couple of nights with scary flashbacks every time I close my eyes, and feeling the most unsettled I’ve felt in a long time. So is the journey. So is the practice. I haven’t done yoga since I got here and my body felt it when I finally made one of the longest paddle outs ever this morning on my new board with half the volume I’m used to. And. I did it.
I spend my time chanting sanskrit mantras in my head when I’m riding my scooter because it terrifies me, and remind myself that all is well, and everything is as it should be, for my highest good.
I catch the stories I tell myself and the judgements I make about any and every situation, relax my shoulders, and breathe.
I am so far from having it ‘figured out’, and yet, I still find myself with faith, trusting that I’m in the right place, being of the most service to my clients, and excited to start my ICF Coach training tonight thanks to the power of the internet, even in the remote corners of Bali. Whatever we learn individually, benefits the collective
by Emma | Feb 10, 2020
It’s not about what’s best for the other person at the expense of yourself. If you think like that you’ll miss the point.
Do what’s best for yourself – not your ego, but your heart. Use your heart as a compass to express your true self, authentically, and whatever comes to pass will be for the good of all.
Struggling with boundaries because you want to be compassionate too? Holding a boundary you know someone is struggling with means you stop them hurting you. When we hurt people, we hurt. We feel guilt and shame. When you stop someone hurting you, you’re saving them from that guilt and shame, whilst also looking after yourself.
I’m just starting to settle into Bali, seeing clients again and I feel like I have been travelling for weeks, so it’s been a while since I felt strongly about sharing anything. I’m getting there, and getting back to myself and being present to life feels good, as does knowing that in 4 days time I start my PCC ICF Coach training with Coacharya
by Emma | Jan 16, 2020
Please stop thinking that by looking after yourself, you’ll hurt others or make them suffer. What is best for you, can only ever be what is also best for them.
If you create a boundary, you give them a structure, and allow them to make themselves accountable for their actions. You stop them from hurting you, and consequently give them the opportunity to be more loving.
By choosing a direction which disappoints another, you allow them the space to heal and accept that which wasn’t in alignment for either of you.
By following your heart, you allow others to see your light, and, by default, recognise their own.
My highest and best and your highest and best are always aligned, even when it might not seem like it straight away
by Emma | Jan 3, 2020
This is today’s reality. I woke up this morning ready to have a super productive day after being sick for nearly a week. In the end, I drove to town for a shop that was shut for the holidays, did some creative stuff, and managed a small walk in the sunshine with my dog.
I didn’t change lives. I didn’t do a tonne of mindset work, and I didn’t put make up on or brush my hair. That’s OK. Sometimes that’s the way it goes.
I could sit here and look at my daily checklist and berate myself for how poor a human I am, or I could be kind to myself and know that sometimes things don’t go to plan (I very nearly chose the first option). With all the pressure around the new year and needing to become a whole other person, it’s easy to get caught in comparisons and frustration. Don’t. Let’s just remember that we are all processing exactly what we need to process, at exactly the right time. For me, sometimes that looks like pushing an edge and really challenging my own resistance to change and patterns, and sometimes it looks like resting and doing nothing at all related to growth. It’s ALL part of the process.
I know what I’m capable of, and I know what support I need to get there. I am so grateful to the team of people I have around me who keep me focused, challenged, balanced, happy and safe
by Emma | Dec 31, 2019
I don’t believe in becoming ‘enlightened’. I don’t believe that one person is more ‘woke’ than another, or more conscious, or spiritually evolved or whatever you would like to call it.
That, to me, is spiritual bypassing. It’s putting yourself above another, or creating an idol of another, without recognising the oneness that is present in all of us. By saying, she’s on that level and I’m on this level, all we’re doing is creating the illusion of separateness, when most spiritual teachings speak of unity and oneness.
What I do see, is that we are all walking ourselves home, on our own journey, in our own unique and perfect way. It is not for us to judge if someone is ‘lost’ or ‘unconscious’. Maybe their ego is strong, but maybe that’s the journey their Higher Self chose for them. Maybe they don’t need us to interfere to help them ‘see the light’. Maybe, just maybe, they’re on the perfect path for them.
This year, I commit to trusting more. I commit to judging less, and knowing that everyone has their own sovereignty, and their own responsibilities, and that they know what they need to do for them. When people need help, or support, there will be a clear request for it, or an offer, given without expectation or strings. We can let people know we love them without needing to control or ‘guide’ them.
Loving without expectations. Reigning in our own egos and need to ‘help’ or rescue. This is the real lesson here
by Emma | Dec 28, 2019
If you didn’t have anyone to go to, nowhere to run…if you only had yourself to look to for the answers to your problems, where would you start?
We so often run away from ourselves, from our pain and from our suffering, and instead project our fears and anger on to those around us, then tell them they are the ones who need to change, or get help, in order to make us feel better.
Yet, any journey – any true healing you undertake – whether it be through talking therapy or anything else, asks you to look within for your answers, it asks you to heal YOUR wounds, so the external world can reflect a more peaceful internal world.
So, if you couldn’t get anyone else to ‘fix’ your problem, and your only option was to look inside yourself, to really be with, experience and accept the parts of yourself you have hidden from, run away from and rejected for so long, what would that look like?
That – the helping you take responsibility for yourself – is where therapists and healers like myself can help, support, guide and hold you. This combination of ownership, vulnerability, honesty and courage between you and whomever you ask to support you, is what creates a powerful alchemical container for change.
If your heart is longing for the freedom, authenticity and love that comes from no longer hiding from yourself (nor anyone else), have a look at my current programmes and see if we’re a match (links in bio) <3 .
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📸 @loveluella photography
