The blog
thoughts from me to you
Looking inside
If you didn’t have anyone to go to, nowhere to run…if you only had yourself to look to for the answers to your problems, where would you start?
We so often run away from ourselves, from our pain and from our suffering, and instead project our fears and anger on to those around us, then tell them they are the ones who need to change, or get help, in order to make us feel better.
Yet, any journey – any true healing you undertake – whether it be through talking therapy or anything else, asks you to look within for your answers, it asks you to heal YOUR wounds, so the external world can reflect a more peaceful internal world.
So, if you couldn’t get anyone else to ‘fix’ your problem, and your only option was to look inside yourself, to really be with, experience and accept the parts of yourself you have hidden from, run away from and rejected for so long, what would that look like?
That – the helping you take responsibility for yourself – is where therapists and healers like myself can help, support, guide and hold you. This combination of ownership, vulnerability, honesty and courage between you and whomever you ask to support you, is what creates a powerful alchemical container for change.
If your heart is longing for the freedom, authenticity and love that comes from no longer hiding from yourself (nor anyone else), have a look at my current programmes and see if we’re a match (links in bio) <3 .
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📸 @loveluella photography
Feeling safe
I so want this for you. I so very much want you to feel safe to be yourself, to bring all of you to the table, and, if not to feel accepted, to feel at peace knowing that the people who don’t accept you, are not your people.
I want you to know how it feels to be truly comfortable in your own skin, and truly comfortable showing the real you to those you love, and allow yourself to be loved fully, in return.
I want your relationships to feel open, and freeing, not restrictive or censored. I want you to know you are more than enough.
This is not an impossibility, nor is it inevitability. It requires courage, and a decision on your part to step forward, take responsibility, and choose love over the fearful patterns that are currently running in your unconscious. If you would like love, guidance, powerful healing tools, support and cheerleading on this journey, check out Clarity, Compassion and Confidence by clicking the link in my bio
It’s OK
It’s ok not to be ok.
It’s ok to cry one minute and feel happy the next.
It’s ok to get angry at the world, or grieve the losses you’ve experienced personally, or as part of the collective.
It’s ok to be blissfully happy and feel totally in alignment with your highest purpose.
We are all having a human experience, and ALL our feelings are valid, simply because they exist.
The more we try to censor, deny or shame our feelings, the more we bypass our reality and our true selves.
Whatever is coming up for you today, it’s allowed. It’s ok. It’s real. And, if you need support, reach out, I’m here to help, as are the many helplines posted on my stories and others’. You are so very loved
Choices
Sometimes she felt so guilty for feeling so overwhelmed because of the choices afforded to her. She could do anything, which she believed was the same for everyone, but she also BELIEVED she could do anything, so those choices became more tangible for her than perhaps those around her.
And yet, in the freedom of choice, sometimes came the overwhelming fear of making the RIGHT choice.
Sometimes she would stay stuck rather than make a decision, because she didn’t know where to start, and so, eventually, some of the options would be removed and she could make a smaller choice, often the decision to not make a decision, and choose to stay as she was.
This is not how she wanted to use her free will, her power of manifestation and her intuitive guidance. It felt like a waste, especially in the face of those who didn’t feel they had the same opportunities.
And so she took a deep breath, tuned in, put her trust in her own intuition and took responsibility for her freedom. It took courage to listen to her heart and feel what was right, but it felt lighter, and freer when she did, even if she didn’t know how she was going to make it happen.
That taking responsibility, coupled with having faith in being guided to what was best for her, ensured she was always able to move forward, and be grateful for her ability to manifest her dreams
Defining yourself
Ever get that pull to get another qualification, get that job, buy that house or some other material thing you can use to identify yourself and your worth in the world: to make sense of who you are, what you do and why you’re here?
I’ve gone through major phases in the past where I’ve wanted to change my job, change my website, do another training, get another label to assign to myself, so as to explain and define myself to others, as well as myself. Just being ‘me’ didn’t seem enough.
Now I see that pattern when it pops up. I know what game my ego is playing. It’s trying to keep me separate from everyone by assigning me a unique role and label. It wants me to compare and judge everyone, including me, and create conflict where there is none.
What you do does not take away from what I do. What you achieve does not lessen my accomplishments. In contrast, your success is my success. Any way we can allow more expressions of love in the world, is a win win.
It’s true – I am a unique manifestation of energy. I have unique gifts and have a purpose.
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AND, that purpose will always be to embody love, and share love. How I do that is up to me, and I will use my gifts in a unique way to pursue that purpose, but the purpose remains unchanged.
We don’t need any special title, label or thing to make us worthy. We need to recognise that we are part of the oneness of all creation, and there isn’t anything BUT that. Can we find peace in knowing that we are part of something, with a unique path, which only we can tread, and which we are already treading, whether we accept / know it or not? Can we find joy in the successes of others, as we also benefit from them?
We can. Together. I’ve got you.
Link in bio to book a consult.
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📸: @loveluella photography
Brave, not perfect
It’s about being brave, not about being perfect.
There will be so many times where we reach, and fall short of where our egos, our family, our friends or our society think we should be.
This is not a failure.
Being brave, having the courage to be vulnerable, to show heart instead of bravado, this is where the true success is to be found.
In the space where vulnerability meets expectation, and softens the walls that we hold around ourselves to keep us protected and safe; this, THIS is what’s important.
Nothing will feel as good as honouring yourself on your journey and doing what makes you come alive. Do this, and nothing more. Be brave.
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📸: @loveluella photography
A little update
I leave Portugal tomorrow after two months here. It’s been….an experience. I’ve loved so much and also been so challenged by living with other people (and being the only one working, without an office space) when I’m so used to living alone. I’ve grown in ways I didn’t think I would, and been reminded just how much you can learn from judging less and looking inward for the answers (what triggers us in others is what we refuse to see in ourselves). There were times when I was blown away by the sensitivity and kindness of my friends, and times when I felt my work wasn’t being taken seriously and I felt uncomfortable in my own home. This was all my perception and projection of my internal reality.
Throughout it all, there was sunshine, rain, beaches, surfing, yoga, pizza and love. I was reminded why I do the work I do, and why it is so needed, and also how I am just moving through life figuring things out too.
I am so excited to be back in Wales for Christmas, before heading to Bali for a couple of months, and am so happy I can continue working with my amazing clients on this journey. So grateful to feel so supported right now
Struggle and success
Struggle is not synonymous with success.
We are so conditioned to believe the narrative that in order to be successful we need to have fought and struggled, that success doesn’t come easily.
Does this narrative work for you? If that wasn’t true, what story would you prefer? What if success was available independent of struggle? What if, success could be easy, or hard? What if there was space for a choice?
Question your beliefs. Every time something feels heavy, ask if it’s because of a story you’re telling yourself about what is. Change your story. You don’t need anyone’s permission to empower yourself.
Want someone to guide you through the process? Click the link in my bio to book a complimentary consult call – make success easier 💕
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Photo credit: @da1sybrown
Presence
Today I took a full day off to go exploring parts of Portugal I hadn’t seen, and be fully present to the experience.
It’s been an old habit that part of my mind is always on my work, my clients, my to do list. I love all these things, however, they have their own dedicated time.
It’s been a challenge for me to learn to stay present to what’s happening now, and fully integrate the experience. It used to be a way of regulating contact – keeping a safe distance from things and people in my life, before I learned to feel safe independently of whatever situation I found myself in.
Today (and many times), I chose to make a consistent effort to be present, even when my mind wanted to pull me away, and really enjoy each moment. It’s ok that some work didn’t get done, it’ll get done when it needs to.
Where do you live? Here, now? How much do you fully experience each precious moment of your life?