Ever felt like you’re being tested? Like your resolve is just about to crumble if the universe decides to throw just one more thing at you? Do you find yourself looking up to the sky and asking, ‘what did I ever do to deserve this?! or ‘Why do bad things happen to me?!’
You’re not alone. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve had angry conversations with the stars, asking myself whether I’d done something in a previous life, or when I’d catch a break.
Somewhere around 2012 or 2013, I figured out something quite miraculous – the Universe never gives you more than you can handle. There’s a lot of trust that goes with that statement, but if you trust it, it becomes true for you.
If you trust that you will never be given more than you can handle nor more than you are ready to face, you will always be supported, and you will always make your way through. There is no other option.
Now, back to the ‘why’. Since we’ve established that you’ll only be given what you’re ready for and able to deal with, it makes sense that we have to grow in stages. We have to face and unlearn our fearful behaviours and patterns in stages, because otherwise a lifetime’s worth of fear-based behaviours being challenged at once would be too much for us.
By this I mean that we’ve all picked up habits during our lifetimes. We’ve learned to judge, ourselves and others; we’ve learned to beat ourselves up when things go wrong; we’ve learned to pick the wrong types of partners; we’ve learned to hold ourselves back from emotional intimacy in case we get hurt, or to throw ourselves into relationships to try to find the love we crave and can’t find within ourselves.
As we become more aware, we must gently and slowly unlearn these lessons and re-educate our minds to the possibility of a loving and supportive world, and the ability to tap into a source of universal and unlimited love, within ourselves. This process can be difficult and painful, but, as I mentioned above, never impossible.
In order to re-educate our minds, we are provided with opportunities to practice seeing the world in another way and behaving differently. A Course in Miracles calls these opportunities ‘spiritual assignments’. When we choose to show up for these assignments, whether they be a bully, another ‘bad boy’ or a self-pitying friend, they provide us with a chance to practice our new learning. As we become more aware, we begin to notice how we behave affects the situation or person in question and can experiment with choosing to see with love and behaving from a place of compassion. Gradually, we give ourselves the evidence and experience we need to shift our perception. When the lesson is learned, the ‘opportunities’ go away.
If, however, we choose not to show up for the assignment, run away, bury our heads in the sand or just continue with our unaware, self-destructive behaviour of looking at the world through fear-based eyes, the assignment will just keep showing up in more and more obvious ways until we can no longer ignore it. This often corresponds with hitting ‘rock bottom’. When we’re on our knees, we have nowhere to go but up. We have no choice but to surrender, show up and learn how to see things differently.
To save yourself that added pain, if the same type of person or situation keeps showing up in your life, surrender and ask, why is this being brought to me? I’m ready to accept my assignment, and I am asking for help to see this differently.
Keep showing up, keep being aware, keep feeling, keep forgiving, keep trying to see with love and then, finally, you’ll be able to follow your joy!
If you want a spiritual running buddy (love that term Gabby Bernstein!) on this check out The Happiness Plan – a six part video course where I guide you through the steps above and support you on your journey to freedom 🙂