by Emma | Oct 22, 2019
What does your word really mean?
Do you stand by your word? Is it your promise, your bond to follow through and commit, or is it just a fleeting moment of meaningless thought process?
Our words carry weight. They carry the energy of our creation and our sense of self. Who you are is, in part, created by the words you speak into existence and what they mean to you in relation to your actions.
Do your words match your actions? Do your thoughts match your words? If any of these are out of integrity, you will feel the upset in your body, and the response of the people around you.
You create with your words. Using language like “always” and “never”, “good” and “bad”, sets an energetic connection in motion. “Fuck my life” is a popular phrase that makes me want to curl up and cry – why would you want to create the energy of wanting to fuck your life?! Your life is a beautiful gift, even if you’re experiencing temporary moments of suffering.
Choose your words wisely. Please
by Emma | Oct 4, 2019
Positivity is not an inherently good or bad thing. Please stop thinking that you can’t acknowledge when you feel sad, or angry, or betrayed, or any other so called ‘negative’ emotion. It is impossible to negate anything. Denying something’s existence doesn’t make it disappear, it proves it’s there because otherwise there would be nothing to deny.
I’d much rather have a conversation with someone and feel the true depths of their emotion and realness, have them cry and shout and own their rage….than have some fake-ass conversation about how great their life is and how there’s always a silver lining. Yes, we can learn from our experiences and find joy in life, but only after we accept what our current experience is and honour it as part of the journey
by Emma | Sep 29, 2019
Following on from my last post, I got told today that I was too much, too intense and required too much effort to be friends with. I nearly gave the guy a big F you but what I actually did was thank him for his honesty, leave, and cry on my friend’s shoulder.
I cried because sometimes, when someone inadvertently stabs at a wound, we question whether we should hold our head up high and be exactly who we are, no apologies….or look deep within ourselves to see if we’re triggered because they’re right, and we really are what they say.
I cried because I have been told many times, in many ways, that I am too much.
And then I cried because I realised that I had handled the situation less than gracefully, and less than I might have wanted.
Instead of being true to myself and speaking out about how I was feeling, I shrunk away and became uncomfortable in my own skin. I made myself small to make someone else feel more comfortable, and in the process, they felt my energy and determined I was too much effort to be friends with.
Being anything less than 100% yourself is a lose lose situation. It makes others just as uncomfortable as you are.
I learned such a valuable lesson today. I learned that, even though I knew it already, I could no longer suffocate myself for the sake of someone else. It just suffocates all of us.
I am a lot. I am intense with a big presence and I talk a lot about feelings and sometimes I get triggered and uncomfortable and it’s ok if that’s too much for some, but from now on, I will respect the other as well as myself by honouring myself, and letting them go the moment we feel it
by Emma | Sep 17, 2019
Some words of wisdom I know are right, but am still learning to put into practice consistently:
Don’t stay stuck in your victimhood just because giving up the justifications for being hurt or angry seems too great a sacrifice. When the sacrifice you feel by holding your pain becomes greater than the ego’s desire to remain right in it’s opinion of whatever happened, you will naturally let the past go, and find peace. It doesn’t make sense to me that for so long, we have tried to ‘forgive’ and ‘move on’ from trauma, whilst still desperately clinging to the fact that we had wrong done to us, and therefore we are a ‘victim’ or a ‘survivor’. How can we imagine we can let go of trauma and find peace if we continue to carry around the badge of honour we supposedly earned through living through it? We don’t have to deny it happened, but perhaps, one day, we can find a way to see it differently, and realise it is our judgements which cause us pain, and if we stop making things, people and events right or wrong or good or bad, then we can allow ourselves to experience life as it is, instead of making it into something else
by Emma | Sep 2, 2019
And maybe it is in the space in between, in the distance we create between the prompt and the ego, where we find ourselves, and the love that we knew was somewhere, and which we often thought was hiding from us, waiting for us to prove ourselves worthy of it.
Maybe, that love was there all along, waiting for the pause, waiting patiently for us to find it, and realise it was ours all along, waiting to be acknowledged and gifted to the world
