This week has been a bit of a nightmare. When I emailed my director my daily update, I used the term ‘challenge’ instead of nightmare, but the result was the same, I reached Friday exhausted, frustrated and in need of a glass of wine, good nights sleep, bubble bath and yoga. In that order.

So, having suitably chilled the fuck out, I’m now sat nursing my second cappuccino of the day, enjoying the ensuing caffeine buzz and looking back over the week.

A couple of weeks ago I posted about three questions you should ask yourself regularly to ensure you’re continuing to head in the right direction. I posted my answers.

Since then I’ve referred back to them a few times, wondering how I can ‘direct’ myself appropriately.

Anyhoo, that proved to be quite hard work, so I looked at it from another way. I decided to look at what was already in my life that I wouldn’t change, even if I could, no matter what. The weird thing is, sometimes we focus so much on where we’re going and how are lives are moving forward, we forget what we have already achieved.

This isn’t another post about positive thinking or appreciated what you’ve already got, it’s simply something I did to help me focus on what I’m already doing which is working for me – the things I already love; the things I’ve already worked hard for; the things I take for granted and the things I didn’t even realise were important to me.

I actually made my list a lot longer than ten things, but here are a few in the interests of sharing:

  1. My parents and nana
  2. The places I’ve lived
  3. The relationships I’ve had – good and bad
  4. The fact that last year I boycotted my best friend’s wedding. We’ve only just started talking again and I still don’t know if she’ll ever forgive me or truly understand but I stood true to what I believed in, without that I have nothing.
  5. Blowing the money I was saving to quit my job and do this full-time so that I could move in to my current flat.
  6. ….

The rest I’m keeping to myself.

One thing I did realise from all this: the couple of ‘problems’ I thought I was dealing with, when I asked myself what my motivation was for removing them from my life, and what I’d want to replace them, I realised that I didn’t actually want to get rid of them. On some level they have a purpose in my life currently  and I actually value them.

What wouldn’t you change, even if you could?