Closing a door so you can heal or honour yourself does not mean it has to stay closed forever.

I’ve been reflecting a lot on boundaries this week, and how strong boundaries must also be flexible boundaries.

Needing to “close the door” to someone or something because it feels unhealthy to keep it open right now doesn’t mean it needs to be locked and bolted. Closing a door blocks the draught and allows you a safe space to heal. It is also a barrier.

Boundaries need to be strong AND flexible. They need to be in place only for as long as they are useful because they always by nature create a block and separation. Separation perpetuates fear.

Everything changes and so boundaries need reviewing periodically. A boundary is never against a person but about behaviour and how you feel. If in time, if the situation changes, you heal and they heal, it may be the door can be opened again to let in fresh new air and a new situation. If someone (or you) hasn’t done the work or healed that boundary may remain in place forever.

Never be afraid to open a door that has been closed. Trust yourself and your heart to know what is best for you, but do it only from a place of genuine and unconditional (unattached) love. Growth and healing has to have happened on both sides if you don’t want a repeat performance, and you only have control of your healing.