And maybe it is in the space in between, in the distance we create between the prompt and the ego, where we find ourselves, and the love that we knew was somewhere, and which we often thought was hiding from us, waiting for us to prove ourselves worthy of it.
Maybe, that love was there all along, waiting for the pause, waiting patiently for us to find it, and realise it was ours all along, waiting to be acknowledged and gifted to the world
Rest comes not from sleeping, but from waking. ~A Course In Miracles
Quite often, I’ve looked at this sea over the last few months and just started crying, because I have no words for how beautiful it is and how grateful I am to be here. Cornwall and it’s community are teaching me how to be much more present to life, how to see clearly, and rest peacefully. The beauty we see is a reflection of the beauty inside us, if we choose to acknowledge it
I’ve noticed myself being super impatient and irritable the last few days….then the sun came out and I remembered that I get to choose how I feel and how I want to move through the world.
Note to self: you cannot receive what you are not already giving. If you’re not already giving it, it’s because you believe you lack something, and are looking for it outside yourself. You cannot receive what you think you don’t have, because we’re all one (so you’re trying to get something from yourself that you belief you don’t have – that’s why it’s impossible). I know, I know. It’s a lot….and maybe it will resonate or not. It’s all ok. All paths lead end in the same place
What can we hope for, except truth? There is little chance of promises being kept, unless they are promises of change, for we can no more tell if we will always be kind than if the sun will warm our faces that day. Because really, isn’t that all we truly want to know? Will you be kind to me? Will you treat me well? Is my heart safe with you?
And of course, we can never know, because we are all imperfect and the chances are we will forget to be kind one day, and someone will choose to blame our momentary lack of integrity on a fundamental character flaw, destined to be repeated and therefore requiring us to be written off or punished with distance…. Or perhaps, they will instead recognise our imperfections as their opportunities to heal….and allow us both the opportunity for radical honesty and transparency, rather than promises we can only ever hope to keep. Perhaps even, that we will trust ourselves to hold our hearts safely, and that when we open those hearts to others it is done so with the knowledge that whatever happens, our hearts will always be safe, because we put our faith in love, not an imperfect interpretation of who someone else should be
“If it’s the highest and best for anyone, it’s the highest and best for everyone, because we’re all one.” @jenniferhelenhadley with the great reminder to trust the process last night
Sometimes (always), it wasn’t about wrong or right, and it wasn’t about making something be true when maybe it wasn’t, it was just about being: recognising that without the judgement – the constant need to make sense of things, make meaning of things….there was nothing left to fight, and there she found her peace.
And that peace pervaded everything if she let it. If she finally surrendered her desire to control, her fear that giving up what she thought she wanted would lead her to miss out on something meant for her, instead of gaining what she didn’t know she really wanted all along.
There is method in the madness. There is serenity in the surrender. There is peace in the perfectness. Could she cultivate a little more faith in this?