She realised that she couldn’t move forward whilst simultaneously rejecting or abandoning parts of herself.
She couldn’t leave part of herself behind on the journey. It was a part of her. She could reject it, or banish it to a deep dark corner of her being, but it would never leave her. There it would fester, hurt and rejected, until it became strong enough to rise up and be heard.
It would ‘sabotage’ her, ‘block’ her and leave her feeling out of control. She knew this now.
Maybe she would do her best to shove it back in it’s box, like she had countless times before, until one day, she wouldn’t be able to. It would grow too big and it would not be silenced anymore.
And so she understood, finally, that it was not the enemy. It was trying to survive an oppressive regime she had implemented by any means necessary.

Maybe there was a different way….
She could take that part under her wing. Listen to it. Understand it. Love it. Heal it.
Then she watched as it became her biggest support and worked with her to accomplish everything she wanted in life, whilst she was finally at peace with herself.