Please stop thinking that by looking after yourself, you'll hurt others or make them suffer. What is best for you, can only ever be what is also best for them. If you create a boundary, you give them a structure, and allow them to make themselves accountable for their actions. You stop them from hurting you, and consequently give them the opportunity to be more loving. By choosing a direction which disappoints another, you allow them the space to heal and accept that which wasn't in alignment for either of you. By following your heart, you allow others to see your light, and, by default, recognise their own. My highest and best and your highest and best are always aligned, even when it might not seem like it straight away