I sat down last night and thought about all the things that the people who come to this site stress about the most, since that’s what this site is all about – helping stressed people get de-stressed, gain clarity and focus so they can feel confident moving forward.
Those ‘people’ are you. So I’m writing this post just for you, because I know if you’re here, it’s because at some point recently you’ve felt stuck and frustrated. You maybe don’t even know where you want to go, and even if you did, you wouldn’t know how to get there anyway, so what’s the point?
Are you happy? Are you wake-up-in-the-morning-smiling-about-how-good-your-life-is happy?
If your answer isn’t a resounding yes, that is your point.
I’ve met a few different people over the years. Some of them have astounded me with their positivity and ‘glass-half-full’ attitude whilst others have disappointed me with how closed-minded they are to the possibilities life offers.
Some of these people are closer to home than I’d like to admit. One person in particular, was me (quite some years ago now, thankfully!).
Sometimes you get pushed down a certain route and it seems completely illogical to question it or think about what the other options might be. This might be the work route, like it was for me, or it might be how quickly you settle down or where you choose to live. It doesn’t matter, you always have the right to question whether things are right for you…and you should.
I get that sometimes it’s really hard to see options in your life if you’ve set down a certain path and invested any amount of time or effort or money in to it. Sometimes it’s so demotivating it’s really hard just to summon the energy to think there could be a better way.
I’m here to tell you that if there’s one thing you take away from coming to this site, it’s that you ALWAYS have options.
This is really important so if you just skipped over that with a ‘yea, yea – heard it all before but my situation’s different’ – it’s not honey, I’m sorry. We’re all unique and super special in our own ways but everyone, regardless of who they are, has choices.
Even the person in jail has the opportunity to keep their head down, educate themselves and hopefully get out on parole rather than adding time to their sentence. If you have choices in jail, you definitely have choices as a free person!
Sometimes it’s hard and painful and sometimes it’s the wrong choice but there comes a point when it’s better to do something wrong that do nothing at all.
Take a moment to think about your life.
Where have you been?
Where are you heading?
Where do you want to have been at this point in your life?
Where do you want to be heading?
Compare the first two questions with the last two.
Are there big differences? If there aren’t – great you’re on the right track – go you! If you feel like you’re a mile away from where you want to be,
have a think about the following questions:
Am I reaching my potential?
Could I be doing something that would make me happier?
If I don’t change anything, I am going to have regrets on my deathbed?
If you answered no to the first question or yes to the last two, it’s clear that you need to find some options to change your trajectory in life.
How do you do that?
Simple – you make a list of every single thing you could change in your life, regardless of reasonableness or saneness (not sure if they’re words – go with it!).
E.g. I want to help more people. I could:
a) Quit my job and travel the world preaching about how great life is
b) Quit my job and volunteer in Africa
c) Volunteer for a hour or so a week at a local charity
d) Spend more time helping my friends
e) Re-train as a nurse or another helping profession
etc, etc, you get my drift.
Keep going until you literally can’t think of anymore at all.
Pick the one you’re drawn to the most. Not the one you think is most feasible, that doesn’t matter right now, pick the one that speaks to you – the one you’d LOVE to do.
Ask yourself why.
Why that one? What is it about that scenario that makes your heart skip a beat?
E.g. In the example above, maybe I choose b). Maybe when I think about that one, I think about living a minimalist life, seeing the benefits of my hard work, getting away from the rat-race and living a simpler life.
So actually, it’s not all about Africa. It’s about changing the pace of my life in a way that’s helpful to others.
See what I did there? If you break down the ‘why’ you get a better idea of what you actually want. If that was me above, I now might think about what I can do to slow down the pace of my life at the same time as helping others. Maybe I look at jobs in the Non-Profit sector in a rural area…or maybe I do something completely different.
The point is, before this exercise, I could have been thinking, ‘my job doesn’t help anyone, it doesn’t have a higher purpose but it pays the bills and allows me to have nice holidays in the country so I can’t change it’.
Now I have a whole host of options, along with a better idea of what I actually want to do.
You have options – you just have to figure out what they are.
If this is something that struck a cord with you, I think you’ll really like the stuff in the members only section, which is free to access by signing up on the right hand-side – it’ll fill your head with options – promise! 🙂